I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize