When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize