There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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