this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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