Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize