I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize