we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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