Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Let's get the cat blown out
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize