Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize