Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you didnt know i had herpes?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Still dying that you shit outside
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
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