Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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