so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize