i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I need a beard to bite.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
