i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize