And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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