Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Randomize