we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize