so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
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The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
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My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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