It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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