i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
he thought i was a dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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