To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize