Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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