Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize