My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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