Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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