she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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