was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
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