But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
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I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
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I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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