can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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