Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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