never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
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the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
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Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
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