Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
this hospital has no fireball
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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