Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize