i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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