If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize