You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
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