I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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