I CAN MOONWALK!
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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