I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Acid is not a monday night drug
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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