How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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