My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
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he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
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Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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