When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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