One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
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Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
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he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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