um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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