I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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