All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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