FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize