dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
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She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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