She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You're my little dorito
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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