when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize